Moving Forward After Miscarriage
Today, Jules shares an important lesson learned from her miscarriage. And resources to share with those in need:
October is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, and having miscarried just a few weeks ago, the month holds a very new meaning for me. I was ten weeks pregnant when I stared in a blurry eyed panic at that flat line on the screen...just one week earlier, I had seen that fantastically fast flicker of my baby's perfect heartbeat. I was crushed, and at my D&C the following day, the tears flowed heavily, particularly knowing that, ironically, it was the labor and delivery entrance that took us to the day surgery ward where the fetus -- and my high hopes -- would be removed.
My doctor was wonderful and my family incredibly supportive, but the pain remains so very palpable. Many, many woman who have suffered similar losses came forward in support of me, and I learned that too few (two to be exact) were referred to support services. As a licensed clinical social worker, I was shocked to not receive a referral or even a simple flyer for a support group or resources on managing grief. Everyone going through this type of loss needs to have emotional support offered to her. The hugs and condolences were thoughtful but the real help has been in knowing that I am not alone -- that many women have been through what I've been through, and that it is okay (helpful, even) to take the time to be sad and grieve the loss. Initially I felt silly grieving the loss of something I never had, but the support and refusal of my friends to allow me to isolate myself has shown me a real sense of the importance of camaraderie between women following a struggle with a miscarriage. So today I wanted to share some resources where you can find solidarity and give voice to your feelings if you are currently grieving or find yourself in this position at some point in the future.
Do you have other recommended resources for bereavement support? If so, please feel welcome to share in the comments below.
Image credit: FreeDigitalPhotos.net








Comments
Wow- Good for you Jules! What must be such an unimaginable time in your life you are there giving and sharing with others! You're amazing.. xoxo
Posted by: Amy Rosenthal | October 23, 2012 10:12 AM | Reply to this comment
Jules - Thank you for using your painful experience to educate and support other women. You are inspiring!
Posted by: Emily Paisner | October 23, 2012 10:37 AM | Reply to this comment
Jules, so sorry for your loss and thank you for selflessly sharing your story to help others. I wanted to mention Lisa Ling’s site as another support resource: http://www.secretsocietyofwoman.com
Posted by: Judy C | October 23, 2012 1:19 PM | Reply to this comment
Jules, I'm so sorry for your loss. I was so devastated after I miscarried and I thought that the worst part about the aftermath was I felt so isolated. Getting support is so important and it is so wonderful that you are helping other women know that they should do the same.
Posted by: Priya | October 23, 2012 4:33 PM | Reply to this comment
I'm am sorry for your loss. I am happy to read your story of healing. Miscarriage is very common and yet a taboo subject. People like you are helping change that.
I wanted to add another website/group:
Www.ourhopeplace.com. They are about friends helping friends cope, hope, and heal after miscarriage.
Posted by: Sharon Stenger | October 23, 2012 9:12 PM | Reply to this comment
Thank you so mentioning for mentioning us in this wonderful resource list...even if I wish you didn't need it.
Posted by: Clomid and Cabernet | October 30, 2012 6:09 PM | Reply to this comment